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Divorce is a stressful situation for both people involved in it. Not only is it a mentally draining process but also takes a chunk of your time and energy distracting you from other important priorities. Although couples should seek help and try to continue their marriage, if it isn’t working out, separation might be the only way. If you are someone who doesn’t like to ask for help and feel you have gone through enough already, we have prepared a checklist for you to spare you the burden. This will help you move through the process as smoothly as possible. However, the best advice is to hire a family attorney for legal help.


The first thing you are going to do as a man when it comes to divorce is plan. As mentioned earlier, divorce is not easy for anyone. It is a rollercoaster of emotions and stress. At the same time, there are a lot of minor and major things that need to be discussed that could otherwise go unnoticed.

As a part of the plan, you must hire a good divorce lawyer. This is because you may have to provide child support or other expenses depending on the state and region. That said, do your research and become familiar with the divorce process.

Choose someone who can handle your case the right way and turn off your emotions for a while. This is because divorce can easily turn into a financial or business transaction as well. If you have kids, you must be careful not to disturb them mentally.

Plus, maintain a good relationship with your spouse especially if you have kids. You are going through a tough time, but they are as well. And, you need to keep in mind that kids tend to get affected a lot more than adults in such cases.

Understanding State Laws Governing Property Division And Support

Every state has different regulations about property division and child and spousal support based on the circumstances. For instance, if you have kids, the property division and support are going to be slightly different than if you were without kids.

The state and the court have to decide in the best interest of the kids. It might also be that if you have two kids, one is handed over to your spouse while the other is with you. This could be a stressful situation for the kids as well since they won’t be able to spend much time together.

Understanding these rules will help you argue a lot better in court. This is important as divorces can turn ugly and your spouse may want to have a piece of your money and property. With some background knowledge in hand, you might be able to get away with things that could otherwise be easily enforced upon you.

Try Out Of Court Settlement

Hiring a lawyer and taking the divorce situation to court is both expensive and time-consuming. Some couples tend to settle out of court without having to show up at the court proceedings several times on a weekly or monthly basis.

If you still have good relations with your spouse, you should try to go for an out-of-court settlement. The important factors you need to discuss are alimony and splitting the property and debt. Other things you must discuss related to kids are child custody and child support. If both of you (you and your spouse) can settle these things, then you can file for divorce without involving a lawyer. However, even if both parties agree, it’s good to hire an uncontested divorce attorney Fairfax VA who can streamline the process.

Adjust To The Parenting Agreement

If you have kids, you need to do some preparations and adjustments for them. You should create a new plan for the kids that includes the parent’s visitation hours, school break schedules, and other things. Plus, you will need to create a calendar as well to keep track of the time the children have spent with each parent.

Furthermore, you should know whether you will be paying or receiving child support. You may know that child support is a common issue faced by couples once they are separated or divorced. Based on your income, the court may or may not ask you to give an agreed upon amount of money to the spouse at the end of each month to look after the kids.

Compile Important Financial Documents

This is the most important part of the process. Compiling important financial documents will help you handle the case relatively better. To begin with, you should compile a list of your joint assets including bank accounts, vehicles, medical bills etc. All of such important financial information will be needed by the court.

Although, the courts require both spouses to present their financial documents, but not every spouse makes it easy. So, you need to be prepared. Make sure that you do not lie or exclude anything even if it’s irrelevant. The reason is that the court will find out one way or the other and might punish you as well.

Take Steps To Separate Your Life

By now, you must be done with the divorce process. But the real struggle continues once you reach home to find no one there. So, you should prepare yourself for this way before the divorce process begins. For instance, you need to protect your credit score.

Divorces can have a bad impact on your credit score and you might want to open a new credit card in your name. Once you are divorced, open a new account to maintain your credit score. In addition to that, if you have a joint account with your spouse, this is the time to open a new separate account for yourself only.

However, you will need to consult your lawyer about the laws of opening new accounts during or after the divorce process. In some states, the earnings from both spouses are considered joint property. So, if you were to remove some amount, it might impact your divorce process.

Decide Your Living Arrangements

Many divorced couples are not able to afford separate places and decide to live in their marital house when the divorce process is underway. If that is not possible, both of you have to decide who live in the marital house until the divorce process concludes.

If even that does not work out, your lawyer will advise you to ask the court for giving you a temporary exclusive use of the home till the property division process is done. In many states, it’s common for the primary caretaker of the children to stay in the house for minimal disruption of the children’s lives.

If you know that your spouse will live in the house till the divorce process concludes, look for a place as quickly as possible. But you will also want to make sure and ask your attorney that you are simply moving out and not giving up the right to the property.


In the end, getting through a divorce might seem impossible at first. However, know that you can do it but take one step at a time. Regardless of how you choose to handle the case, make sure that you take care of yourself and consult a divorce lawyer Fairfax VA.

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